Let’s talk coping skills

Coping mechanisms are the strategies people often use in the face of stress and/or trauma to help manage painful or difficult emotions. Coping mechanisms can help people adjust to stressful events while helping them maintain their emotional well-being. It’s important to have a in your mind incase of an emergency. Having healthy coping skills can be key to getting through tough times. Coping skills help you tolerate, minimize, and deal with stressful situations in life. Managing your stress well can help you feel better physically and psychologically and it can impact your ability to perform your best.

Everyone goes through a different grieving and coping process. How we handle and react to things is different from person to person.

Types of Coping Strategies

Self-Soothing: Comforting yourself through your 5 senses

• Touch (stuffed animal, stress ball, pet)

• Hear (music, meditation)

• See (happy pictures, movies)

• Taste (tea, favorite snack)

• Smell (candles, lotion)

Distraction: Taking your mind off the problem for a while

• This can look like books, crafts, hanging out with friends, going for a walk, watching a movie, listening to music, going out to dinner, etc.

Opposite Action: Respond to the negative impulse in a positive manner

• This can look like practicing affirmations, inspirational quotes, self-care, “power pose,” etc.

Emotional Awareness: Tools for identifying, expressing, and reflecting on your feelings

• This can look like journaling, drawing, answering self-reflection prompts, writing in a gratitude journal, talking to a friend, etc.

Mindfulness: Tools for centering and grounding yourself in the moment

• This can look like meditation, relaxation, getting a massage, practicing yoga, and doing breathing exercises

Crisis Plan: Contact information and a plan of action in case of an emergency when coping skills are not enough

• Family/friends

• Therapist/psychiatrist

• Crisis Hotline 988

Emotion-Focused Coping Skills vs. Problem-Focused Coping Skill

ESSENTIAL QUESTION: When you’re feeling overwhelmed and in distress, always ask yourself, “Do I need to change my situation or do I need to find a way to better cope with the situation?” Then, you can decide which type of coping strategy will help you best proceed.

Problem-based coping is really helpful when you need to change your feelings/situation, perhaps by removing a stressful thing from your life. For example, if you’re in an unhealthy relationship, your anxiety and sadness might be best resolved by ending the relationship (as opposed to soothing your emotions).

Emotion-based coping is helpful when you need to take care of your feelings when you either don’t want to change your situation or when circumstances are out of your control. For example, if you are grieving the loss of a loved one, it’d be important to take care of your feelings in a healthy way (since you can’t change the circumstance).

Why Are Coping Mechanisms Important?

Knowing and having a mechanism that works for your body and your mind is crucial for when you experience a stressor. “Coping patterns are important because they facilitate a person's handling of a stressful experience," Burns-Nader said. "If someone is going through a tough time, positive coping patterns provide extra resources that can help that person deal with the demand of a stressor."

Coping mechanisms are your best friends when it comes to experiencing stressors or trauma.

5 Of My Favorite Coping Skills

1. Journaling. When I’m overwhelmed and all over the place, sometimes It helps me get my emotions out through journaling because it helps me organize my thoughts, it proves thoughts, and it also helps me reflect.

2. Music/Podcasts. I love listening to songs that are perfect for my mood. I also love to make playlists because it calms me down while also allowing me to express how I feel. Listening to music also helps me focus and be productive. I recently got into podcasts and have been playing them when I’m driving in the car alone sometimes. I think podcasts are a great outlet because there are so many different ones to choose from that will literally go over anything you could possibly think about. I love podcasts that relate to topics i’m interested in because I can relate and connect to the content creators. Through listening to podcasts, I learn more about the world while also learning more about myself. Also, if you are lonely or isolated, podcasts can make you feel like you are FaceTime-ing or hanging out with a friend!!!!!

3. Crying. Crying is a natural response humans have to a range of emotions, including sadness, grief, joy, and frustration. It releases toxins, relieves stress, enhances mood, and has a soothing effect. Sometimes a good cry is just what I need.

4. Self-Care. Self-care is the easiest way to make yourself feel clean, cleansed and productive. When I’m down, I like to do a nice skin care routine and face masks to make myself feel better. Also, I like to get dressed to feel more confident and also efficient. A day full of self-care activities is a great remedy.

5. Creating to-do lists. One of the best ways to feel accomplished even when you feel like a disaster is to make a to-do list that you can add to and cross off. I love the feeling of crossing something off my to-do list. It’s the little things in life:)

What is your favorite coping mechanism? If you don’t have one, think about which ones you want to try.